Obituary

http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/nwherald/obituary.aspx?n=michael-george&pid=138963486

Today… help me to rest in Your plan

Today my prayers are for my Caden, Ellie, and Will. Please help me continue to rest in God's sovereign plan for each of their lives.

I ask Lord, that You will help me continue to be the best earthly parent for them as I seek Your wisdom and guidance for the remainder of the precious time You have given Rick and I to spend with each of them. Help me to rest in the knowledge that our sweet Michael is rejoicing in the midst of all of Your glory and splendor as I type here in this dark world that I live. There is no darkness where Michael is. There is no pain. There are no tears. You are my hope for this day. Thank You for Your undeserving grace and love that You have shared for me and my family. I don't deserve an ounce of this compassion, nor will I ever fully understand. Michael does. Give me patience as I wait for that day to be united again. Already it has felt like an eternity since Michael has left me. I can only do this with You. Amen.

~Summer

January 22nd Ended With Hope

On January 22^nd at 9:32pm, we beheld Michael Jesse, and he beheld God's glory.

It hurts so much. My only rest is in the knowledge that he is not hurting at all and is in perfect peace -  safe in the arms of God. This is the hope that has never left our hearts since we knew about Michael's diagnosis on October 13^th.


"But now, Lord, what do I look for? My hope is in you." Psalm 39:7

Memorial Service Information

A memorial service for Michael Jesse George will be held at Cary Grove Evangelical Free Church (525 Ada St., Cary, IL) on Saturday, January 30th at 10am. Visitation will be held on the same day from 9am – 10am. A private burial will follow later.

In lieu of flowers, Rick and Summer would be honored if donations would be made in memory of Michael given to either Cary Grove Evangelical Free Church or to The Haven Network, a faith-based perinatal hospice. Donations made to the church will go towards a fund to help furnish the nursery in the new church building. Cary Grove Evangelical Free Church will handle all donations under the family's direction. Checks may be made out to the church.

Rick and Summer have been incredibly grateful for the prayers, support, gifts and encouragement of our many blog readers, friends, family and church family. We have never felt alone or discouraged in our trial. Truly, “Every time [we] think of you, [we] give thanks to [our] God” (Phil. 1:3).

Michael Jesse George

Summer delivered Michael Jesse tonight. His heart beat a few times, then he went into the loving arms
of our Savior Jesus. Please be in prayer for Pastor Rick and Summer and the family. Please continue to respect their privacy.

Update

Please strengthen Summer and Rick through your prayers, prayer warriors.  Summer is near delivery.

Here We Go...

Please continue to pray for Rick and Summer. They are inducing her right now and she will not have to have C-Section. Please pray that they will be able to see the baby alive. Pray also for Rick’s parents who are currently on their way here. Pray for safety in travel. Summer’s mom is with them at this time also. Please, respect their privacy and do not visit them at this time. We will keep you updated.

Please Pray

Rick and Summer are headed to the hospital right now. Summer is experiencing some very heavy bleeding. Please pray as this is two days before the expected arrival of baby George...

Keeps Me Praying

While talking to my sister the other night, she said something about my children that made me want to write something.

She said that Caden keeps me in line, Ellie keeps me on my toes, Will keeps me smiling and this baby keeps me praying.

I have spoken with many of you who have voiced how helpless you feel in our situation. I want to communicate to you that you are not helpless if you believe in prayer. I have learned more about prayer through this trial than any other I have faced. Prayer really is enough. This is how I can tell our story: It is prayer that is carrying us through.

It does not eliminate the pain of losing a child. I can't tell you how sad I am as I think of next week's delivery. I still can't imagine leaving that hospital with empty arms. I can't imagine coming home recovering from a delivery without getting up four times a night to nurse a child. I can't imagine January 25, 2011 or any year thereafter. The delivery of our baby will just be the end to another chapter of this baby's life and a new one will begin. I am not the author. God is. And I do have hope of what is to come because of my faith.

~Summer

Only a Few Days

Today Summer had her final appointment with the OB. They did a final ultrasound. I got to see this little person looking back at me on the monitor, with his or her little fists up by the face. What a treasure that was!

There is still no indication on gender. The technician tried so hard too. She did lean towards a boy based on some shadows she saw, but she was not 100% sure. Another technician had also leaned toward boy because of shadows in an earlier ultrasound. A praise we have coming out of the ultrasound is that the placenta has again moved and is no longer low-lying but completely out of the way of the cervix. What an answer to prayer! Chances of a C-Section are now very low compared to what they were earlier on.

We then saw the OB and she went over final logistics and answered our final questions. This one hit me the hardest – "What time do we need to come to the hospital?". "5:00pm on Sunday" was her reply. This is it. It is the moment in time which I have been dreading since October 13^th. Everything in me wants to say, "Summer, lets just not show up and do something fun instead." I know this is a ridiculous notion, as if Summer can remain pregnant for the rest of her life. But it is what I am feeling. I do not want to face what we will face this coming Sunday night. There will never be a right time for this to happen.

As the days dwindle down, there are a few prayer requests:

1. For our children: That they sense God's peace in this whole situation and through the actions of Summer and I as we parent them through this.
   
2. For Ellie: That God would soften her heart to the real possibility that this baby is a boy when she feels so strongly that it is a girl and that she will be ok with this and will love this baby no matter the sex.
   
3. For our family and friends that are traveling to encourage and support us.
   
4. We so desperately want to see our baby live, for however long it is. Pray that the baby survives the birth and that God's mercy would allow us to see his or her eyes looking back at us.
   
5. Pray that all those nurses, doctors and staff who are involved with our family at the hospital would see one thing: God's love for all of us in a painful world.
   

Thank you. Your prayers and your notes of encouragement have not gone unnoticed. There are times we are not able to respond, but please know that you have encouraged us deeply simply by praying and loving us through this.

Show them Jesus

Our prayers for all of our children have been that they would know Jesus and share Jesus. Our prayers for our fourth child are no different - Show them Jesus, little one.

Join us in prayer that this little one's life will be transparent to the God who created him/her and that many will come to faith and be drawn nearer to the God whose love for us is inseparable and incomparable. Show them Jesus, little one. Show them Jesus.

God Even Interprets Prayers of Gibberish

If Romans 8:26 tells us that God interprets our groaning, then certainly He interprets our prayers of gibberish. Tonight Will prayed for the baby. While Summer was putting him to bed, they were laying down together. All of the sudden, he sat up, lifted up her shirt and said, "Hi baby". "I love you". I wish I would have recorded his voice to capture his way of talking, because many times it is hard to tell what he is saying in his 2 year old gibberish, but you could definitely tell what those words were.

Then he did the most amazing thing. He put his hand on her belly and started praying for the baby. I absolutely love his prayers. There have been times when he has prayed long prayers and we have no idea what they consist of except for the "A - men" at the end (and he puts a separation between the syllables like that). Tonight he prayed a prayer only he and God know and he was definitely focusing it on the baby as his hand rested on Summer's belly.

All four of our children have taught us so much about life and faith. Thank you, Jesus, for blessing us so abundantly.

 

Ok, Prayer Warriors – We Need Prayer

In no particular order. Obviously with all of these requests, I am praying in God's will.

1. That God would bring this baby into this world sooner than January 25th. The waiting game is getting really difficult.

2. Our baby is in the complete breech position. This means that the baby's bottom will come first followed by his/her crossed legs and head. Basically folded. After reading probably too much about this, I am now fearful that our baby will have it's oxygen supply cut off from too much pressure on the umbilical cord during delivery. I also fear that if the baby is in this particular position of breech, I may (or may not) have to have a c-section if he/she is too small to deliver and gets "stuck".

3. Prayer for Caden. He is showing signs of stress with a decreased appetite and is starting to get mouthy to Rick and I. It breaks my heart.

4. That Rick and I can make the time to have a date with each of our children individually.

5. For our family who will be traveling – safe travels.

6. Sleep. This is a foreign word to me lately.

Thank you. This is so painful in every way. But God is good and I still know that and am able to say it with my words and really believe it.

~Summer

The Breaking from the Lord

I have found it odd (due to my faithless analytical mind) that it is during this trial of suffering that I have found a deep contentment and peace with the Lord. I have a deeper sense of joy and a greater faith in the unseen than I have ever had in my entire believing life. Yet at the same time I still experience the heartache, the situational anger, the emotional ups and downs, and the bewilderment of the unknown as much as anyone who experiences the loss. How could this be? I recently came across a quote by Oswald Chambers:

"We all know people who have been made much meaner and more irritable and more intolerable to live with by suffering: it is not right to say that all suffering perfects. It only perfects one type of person ...... the one who accepts the call of God in Christ Jesus."

I have sensed God's sanctifying work in this trial from the beginning. I know what His ultimate purpose is for me in this trial – to mold me. Perhaps it is this knowledge given through Christ which has helped me to keep my eyes focused on Him through the fire. I am humbled by this grace.

For sure, through this trial and others I have experienced, I have come into full frontal assault with who I am. I meet myself square on. It is true that, "Adversity introduces a man to himself." For it is I who fights with I in a battle of the surrender of control, a thing of which I have never possessed but in my flesh imagined that I maintained.

"One man's experience drives him to curse God, while another man's identical experience drives him to bless God."

Could it be that it is in this battle over surrender which will determine how we will react to suffering? To curse or to bless? To which I ask, which brings more joy? More peace? More faith?

I suppose to answer my reflection above about how I find it so odd to find such contentment and peace in this trial, I would turn to this quote:

"Blessings alone do not open our eyes. Indeed, blessings by themselves tend to close our eyes. We do not come to know Him in the blessing, but in the breaking." -Chip Brogden

And it is true that in the times I have felt the most blessed are the times when I have appreciated Him the least in comparison to this trial when I have been on my knees in the desert digging for a drop of water and upon discovering it, I have appreciated Him the most. O, in the words of Paul, "what a wretched man I am" that God would have to bring such brokeness to create a pure and passionate heart bent on Him alone.

^"I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation.  But take heart;

I have overcome the world." John 16:33 ESV

My Beloved

This morning I opened my NIV Worship Bible* to begin studying Jeremiah and discovered an excerpt titled, "My Beloved". Someone took passages of scripture, paraphrased them and put them into a letter format with God as the first-person pronoun. The result of which really ministered to me as I consider the life God gives us, no matter how long or short it is. Here is the letter:

My Beloved

Before you were born, you were special to Me. I knew you before you were conceived in your mother's womb. With My own hands I fearfully and wonderfully created every detail that makes you unique. I knit together your body, soul and spirit.

I saw you long before you ever existed. I watched every day of your life. So I know you. I know where you have been, where you are, and where you are going.

If only you knew the thoughts I have toward you. Did you know My thoughts for you outnumber the grains of sand on all the beaches of the world? You are the apple of My eye. When trouble approaches, I hide you in the shadow of My wings. I have even engraved you on the palms of My hands.

It is My love for you that makes you precious and honored in My sight. I created you for My glory, and I will never abandon what I have formed and made. My goodness and love will follow you every day of your life. So do not fret; I will fulfill My purpose for your life. And always remember… My love endures forever and ever!

Paraphrased from the following passages: Ps 17:8; 23:6; 100:5; 138:8; 139:13-18; Is 43:4-7; 49:16; Jer 1:5

*The NIV Worship Bible, Copyright ©2000 by the Corinthian Group, Inc., Dana Point, CA

Addresses

Section 9, Block 40, Grave 11

This is the baby's new address - his/her temporary residence. Rick and I went out to the cemetary this week to see where the plot was. It was frozen and cold in every way possible - literally and figuratively. I hated every part about being there.

Heaven. A place where I really can't describe but I know I want to be there. A place where our baby will soon be. A place so beautiful that it is indescribable. A place not everyone will go without trusting in our Lord and Savior.  A place where:

"He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever." Revelation 21:4

Don't you want to be there with us?

How I long to be there.

~Summer

Will My Heart Celebrate?

Hi all. Tomorrow, January 6^th, Summer has another OB appointment. Three weeks ago we were notified that the inducing date has been set for January 24^th. A week ago she started bleeding, due to early stages of labor. It seems like everything is going so fast. It could be tomorrow, it could be the 24^th. No matter the date, it is too soon. We are not ready to say goodbye. Much like we were never ready to bring home our first child, we will never be ready to say good bye to this one. I don't always feel like this, but tonight I kept wishing that this dream would be over and I'd wake up and discover that we will be bringing home a healthy baby in a few weeks. That what is represented by that buldge in Summer's belly is bringing about a joyous celebration, instead of a sober reflection. But life is supposed to be a celebraton, no matter the length. Will I find joy? Will my heart celebrate?

This all to say that we could use your prayers specifically for our hearts. As the day looms closer, it gets harder. The stress level and anxiety has escalated in our home. The children have been playing off of it. It hasn't helped that we (mostly Summer) have not been getting much sleep due to Will's bronchitis, but it is now getting better. Some things on our list of to-dos have been completed, and I thought that would make me feel better, but there's no reprieve from the pain, except maybe when we are worshiping in the shadow of the Almighty, turning our eyes from this world and upon Him.

So please pray for peace in our hearts and home and for rest. Also pray for Summer's appointment tomorrow and for good health for her and all of our family.

December 30th, 2000

(Written on December 30^th, 2009)
As we prepared for our big wedding day nine years ago, I am now reflecting back of how naieve I was! How scewed my perspective was on what marriage really was. All I wanted was someone to come home to, someone to share my life with, someone to share children with. Well, now its December 30, 2009 and marriage is that but oh so much more.

Today, I started spotting some and experiencing some cramping. I also had noticed that the baby's movement had decreased signifficantly. As we made our way to see the doctor, I gave into the temptation to play out what would be next. In my mind, I was preparing for delivery of a baby that had already passed. My faithFUL husband kept telling me there was no need to play the unknown out, that we had no concrete answers.

When the doctor looked for the heartbeat on the doplor, he could not find it. Again, I started playing out how once again things have changed not at all in my favor. Throughout the last three months it had not occurred to me that this baby (just as much as any other pregnancy) could die before delivery. How prideful of me to think otherwise. After all, who was in control of the duration of this child's life from the begining of time? Oh yes........ God. NOT SUMMER.

As the doctor ordered an ultrasound, my steadfast husband and my trembling self sat in the waiting area waiting to be called. More waiting. This room was small. As I looked up in between tears of fear and diasppointment, I saw three pictures hanging on the wall of butterflies. "Aren't butterflies a sign of life?", I said to Rick. Rick was silent. I wanted to rip them off the wall in my anger.

The tech squirted the cold gel on my tummy as she explained what she was going to do. Her voice was calm, but had concern in it. I started praying for her. How horrible was this part of her job? I couldn't imagine.

I asked not to see the monitor. However, Rick intently looked over me. I said, "honey, you don't have to look". To all of our surprises, the tech confidently said, "I have a heart tone". I think I exhaled for the first time in 20 minutes. This child still had life.

Dr. Pines (my doctor was not in) was also shocked. He evaluated my bleeling once more and attributed it to my body preparing for delivery. I had started to dialte 1-2 cm. and he did not think the blood was from the placenta, but the doctor was also unsure if the placenta had fully moved. Apparently the placenta was right at 2cm away from the cervix. It needs to be at 2.0 for a natural delivery. The ultrasound tech laughed when she detected this measurement as it is not common for someone to be RIGHT at a 2.0 measurement. Maybe a 1.9 or 2.1! Again, when will I start to trust God in all of his good ways to EXPECT him to show up in all of His perfection?

Oh yeah. One last thing, the baby is now breeched. In a healthy pregnancy they would probably deliver by c-section. In all of our emotion this day, I forgot to ask what they would do to deliver if the baby was in this position. I am assuming they wouldn't do a c-section because it would be less harmful to me to deliver naturally. So prayer warriors, pray this would change. My prayer is that the baby would be delivered alive.

So happy anniversary to me. What a memory. Rick later told me that he was praying, "Not today Lord." Neither of us could bear to share our blessed wedding day with the death of our child. However, deep within me, I knew God was in control. But oh, how badly I wanted some of that power. Fact is, I have none.

Our anniversary ended with going out to dinner and shopping for a burial outfit for our precious baby. Emotionally exhausting and a draining day to say the least.
I praise God for my husband. God has brought us through countless trials over the last 9 years. This, our hardest. And yet, God is faithful. The last part of our vows we wrote to each other were, "I love you Rick (Summer)and I trust God for us always." Nine years ago, I thought I knew what that meant. I think I am starting to get its true meaning. This is what faith is. Faith is living as though God's Word is true even when I do not feel that it is true.

I know my faith will shake at times, but I pray that this trial Rick and I are facing will help me not waiver so much in the future of what God has in store for us.

I pray everyone a Happy New Year. It is a new year and I pray you will see God in a new light no matter where you are at with your faith.

~Summer

Yearning for God so much it hurts

When I study scripture in my personal time with God, I usually take a chapter, parse it out by paragraphs and then begin to paraphrase it. I consider the context – who, what, where, why, when. I consider what has come before and what is coming after. I consider what type of literature I am studying – is it poetic? Is it wisdom? Is it prophetic? And so on. While considering these things, I begin to paraphrase the passage and in so doing, I apply it to my life.

Recently my eyes have rested upon Psalm 42. I've read this Psalm many times before, but I haven't fully appreciated what God is saying through the life of this Psalmist. When I discovered that this Psalmist is a worship leader, my soul perked up. Here is someone who led worship in the temple of God, yet also struggled with keeping his eyes focused on God when all things seemed dreary at best.

I decided to share with you my paraphrase of this Psalm. I would encourage you to read Psalm 42 side by side with my paraphrase or to at least read it before you read this paraphrase. I would not suggest that my paraphrase is exegetically correct, but it does help others get into my heart and mind a little as I sort out my thoughts and emotions through the reading of God's Word.

Verses 1-4

My all yearns for You, God, so much I hurt. It's like how a thirsty deer yearns for fresh water. My sadness has overwhelmed me, my lack of faith brings darkness upon me. I am unclean and unprepared to meet with God. I recall those times when I have led worship in front of the congregation with celebration and joy and thanksgiving. How can I do that now?

Verses 5-8

Why do I lack in faith? Why do I despair? I need to wait upon the Lord, for I will yet again praise Him for His help and deliverance. Yet right now I am still in despair. I recall Your guidance in my life and the victories You have accomplished on my behalf. Even in the times when I have felt like I was in the deepest darkness, You have refreshed me with abundant water, for my cup overflowed. I know You are so faithful – I see Your blessings of mercy throughout each day and at night You sing lullabies over me. This leads me into prayer and conversation with You, God.

Verses 9-11

At times I say to You in anger, "Why?" "Have You forgotten Your promises regarding me?" I continue to mourn because of all that the enemy throws at me. Sometimes his oppression is so great it is crushing me, causing those around to ask, "Where is your God?" I say to myself, "Do not despair, put your hope in the eternal God, and praise Him." For He will deliver and prosper me from the confines of death and I will live in the house of the Lord forever.

Are You Ready for the Big Day?

Are you ready for the big day?

These were the words of a Pampers advertisement we received in the mail the other day. Of course when I read these words, they meant something totally different than the intention of the advertisers.

At many baby showers I have attended, if given the opportunity to share advice to the mom to be, I have shared something like this:

"As you become a mother, you will experience a joy that you never have before. Holding this fully dependent baby, you must be able to FULLY commit this child to the Lord every day placing him/her back into the arms of Jesus knowing that this is His child. He has graciously "lent" this child to you for a time, so it is now your job to do the best that you can to raise this child in the Lord's ways. We should be able to do this with every relationship God graces us with, but having your first child is a type of relationship you have never experienced. It is easy to forget that this child is an undeserved gift from the Lord and how easy it will be to think we know better then God as we raise this fully dependent person. Once we realize that this is God's child FIRST, we can then understand that this child is as fully dependent on God's will as we are. If we can surrender both our life and the child's life to God, what a great perfect place that is to be."

So, am I daily turning my children over to the Lord? Are you?

Let's be honest. This is extremely hard and we all know that if we are a parent. At times, it is a moment by moment thing of turning them over to the Lord. No matter what stage of life they are at. I have learned this as I watch some of my mentors parent their adult children. I think it goes without saying that this is the hardest trial in this area I have ever been in, but it is challenging me by my own words. Am I really letting God do His work? Am I really seeking His will for all four of my children's lives? I wish I could say I was doing this all the time.

Today, I submit myself to You, God. May I be less and You be more - in all of the relationships you have blessed me with. How ever long or short lived they may be.

~ Summer